My Husband Promised He Wouldn’t Go Through With His Barbaric Plan for Our Son. But I Might Have to Resort to Surveillance.

Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .

My husband, “Clark,” and I have been dealing with a mildly embarrassing issue with our 3-year-old son, “Dewey.” We have been trying to get him out of this habit, but Clark has recently proposed a solution that is completely unacceptable.

Over the last six months or so, Dewey has developed a habit of grabbing his crotch while talking to people or simply standing around. Now Clark wants to put one of those remote control shock collars for dogs on our son! I told him it was out of the question, and he agreed not to do it. Thing is, I’m the primary breadwinner, and I work outside our home while Clark is left to watch Dewey. My husband has a habit of telling me one thing and doing another when I’m not around. Now I’m scared he may decide to go along with his solution when I’m not there. Is secretly installing nanny cams the answer to make sure he doesn’t go back on his word?

Wow. I hope this question is made up. But, assuming it’s not, here goes. First of all, the biggest problem here is that (and I can’t believe I’m typing this) you don’t trust your husband not to shock your child while you’re out of the house . Leave this fool. Now.

Don’t just leave him because he would suggest physically abusing your son, also leave him because you can’t trust him not to. Telling you one thing and then doing another is not a “habit.” That’s called lying. Lying is bad and so is Clark. Bye Clark.

And another thing! Kids grab their crotches! Figure out if it’s just a nervous habit or if it’s itchy. If it’s the latter, bathe him more and talk to your pediatrician if that doesn’t fix it. If it’s the former, he’ll grow out of it when enough people look at him funny or ask him to stop because it’s weird. That’s it! No shock collar. Stop worrying about it! Kids are weird.

I have a 17-year-old daughter, “Melissa.” In Melissa’s AP English class, they got an assignment to write a report on a non-traditional prose work, specifically to analyze how it deviates from genre norms and what, if anything, was achieved by this. Melissa wrote hers without any input from me, which is normal for her classwork, which is always of high quality. Earlier today, I got a call from her teacher.